Adios!!

Selamat Jalan

I hate saying goodbyes! Seriously! It happened when my best friend left for Perth when i was in secondary 3, it happened when i left for Perth Myself after Secondary 5 (14yrs as classmates together), and it happened so many times again during my 4.5 yrs here in Perth. People come and go, and having to say goodbye really stings. My priority in life has always been on friendship, and that is the reason why i have the verse " John 15:13~ Greater love have no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." hanging on my neck all the time. Sadly speaking , authentic friendship cant be build overnight. It takes a lot of time to nurture and sew friendship together. Some can be done relatively quickly, while others may take years. Regardless, it is undeniable that the more time it takes to build one, the stronger the bond that exist in that friendship. A true friendship requires many sacrifices, because friendship at its very core, is love, and love breeds sacrifice. Another verse that greatly emphasizes the importance of a friend is, Proverb 17:17~ "A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born of adversity." and Proverbs 27:5-6~Better is open rebuke, than love that is concealed. Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy."


You may then ask, Mel, "what is love? how do you define love for a friend?" The world has many definition and answers to that particular question, but i seek mine from God. Take out your bibles if you may, and turn to 1 Corin 13:1-8, 1 Peter 4:8, 1 John 3:16 and 1 John 4:18. I'm not listing down the verse here because i want you to work that fat ass of yours and open that dusty book that you keep somewhere a.k.a the bible. can you see the similarity in all those verses? The common theme in all of them? Love is not about I, is about you. It's not about what you can do fore me, but what i can do for you, thus the term sacrifice. Jesus, above all the other things that he calls himself, also calls himself our friend.


We can bare the image of being popular and being surrounded by many people, and be arrogant and proud of that sheer number of acquaintances that we have, but how many of these people are there to build you? having many people by your side doesnt necessarily means that they will stand by you, and being arrogant because of the sheer number of people that you know or knows you, makes you a greater fool. From past experiences, it is not the quantity that matters, but the quality. It is far better to have 1 solid friend, than to have a dozen noisy gongs. As i shared previously in my post "Remember the fishes", you have to be careful of what you let into your ears and into your lives. If what they say hurts, but is constructive, then humbly listen and learn, but instead, if what they say hurts, and is destructive, then rebuke it in name of Jesus Christ. For we were not made for lesser but for the greater . You will inevitably meet people that will put you down throughout your walk in life, even Christians. But always remember, during this time, we find our solace, our peace , our courage and our strength in a friend of which God has placed in our lives; Proverbs 18:24 ( A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother)


I'm pretty sure we all have our own past and history, and i dare not say that i understand what you guys have been through, because truthfully speaking, i dont, and no one except God can truly understand how you feel because each of us goes through a different ordeal, although similar, is still different in its own unique way. So in regard to this, i always use my own examples and experience of which i have been through personally. For it is rude otherwise to simply use the examples and experience of others, when i do not fully understand what they have been through.


So where was i ? hmmmm.....thats right, the importance of a solid friend by your side.


I have shared with you many times on my past, and how ugly and miserable it was. Generally speaking, i'm not exactly the type of guy that people would want to associate themselves with. And to say that i'm a super tough macho guy that is not affected by what others say about me, is an absolute lie. The sad truth is, no matter how much i twist and turn and lie, i'm still affected by what others say about me. Who isnt right? In my case however, i have let this voices linger within me for so long, that i've come to accept all the rejection and negativity as part of me. I've even accepted the fact that it is easier to prove a person right, than to prove them wrong. It took God to intervene in this vicious string of lies by using people like Andrew, Gen, Jimmy and Cindy, to call me out of darkness. He had to use them to make me realise that i have been living in captivity, bonded by chains of negativity and rejection. I have accepted a lie, and lived a lie, and i would have continue doing so if God had not thrown in people like them into my life to help me realize who i really was. Truth be said, i have not fully picked myself up from that nasty fall, but at least i now know my identity in Christ. If pride is what comes before a fall, then shame is what keeps you from getting up after one.



These are several phrases that impacted me during this week and challenged me to rise above my adversities. I hope they do the same for you guys as well .

"If you always lose, losing can be passed off as a lifestyle instead of a defeat." by Gordan Dalbey in "Healing the Masculine Soul"

"Linger too long in the stench of your hurt, and you will smell like the toxin you despise."by Max Lucado in " Facing Your Giants"

So guys, be that sort of friend to someone else. If you cant see it happening, or if you feel that so and so is hard to love, then please think of me. I wouldnt be half the man i am today if someone else didnt find it in themselves to love me. Surely it was tough to change me by loving me, but they did it anyways. I'm not perfect, and i'm not a saint, in fact, i dont deserve to call myself a christian, but their love and sacrifices for me created a change in my life, and although sometimes it is not visible to the naked eyes, i assure you, something in the spiritual realm is definitely changing, the moment you chose to act , pray and proclaim in the name of Jesus. :D